~Fairy Tales~

"the one that listens and hears everything,
the one that sees you and looks right through your soul,
the one that makes you believe in every fucking fairy tale you've ever been told.."

~Think~

Think of the words.
Put them in order.
Make her smile.
Make her laugh.
Never make her grumpy.
Never make her cry.
Think of the words.
Those 3 words.
Me.You.Us.
Then Smile....

~Merry Christmas~

While everyone is busy exchanging presents,
We just want to feel your presence,

While everyone is busy having a feast,
We wished you knew how much of you we've missed,

While I have Mum and Koko to keep me strong,
I hope that someone up there keeps you strong,

I hope that someone is keeping you company,
On this day and for every other day,

Merry Christmas Pa.
Till we meet again...

p/s : Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year...

~Journey~

Got this idea to write this small piece from the most unpredictable source/place/person..but here goes...

"We'll travel together, we'll go on a journey just you and me, and on this journey we'll have no destination, cause the journey will become our destination..."

*Epiphany*

A sudden realization or comprehension of the (larger) essence or meaning of something. Hmmm...since being *down south i've had 'a sudden realization' of many things...and i've been only here for almost 2 months...so here's the list...or the more obvious things i've realized...

1. It's not always clean here...

2. You know you're truly m'sian when you reach into your pockets at the end of the day and find a whole lot of garbage. Cause apparently you get fined and sent for corrective action.

3. You know you aren't local when you're the only one NOT using headphones/playing a psp/playing an iphone when you're taking the public transport.

4. You realize it only takes 30 minutes to get from one end to the other -____-. Traffic jams are apparently being stuck in the same spot for 5 minutes. Anything above that time limit is a national catastrophe.

5. Apparently taxi cab drivers here are expert political advisors/critics that hate the current ruling goverment but at the end of the day they still vote for the same government.

6. You know you're m'sian when it's green to cross the road but you're the only idiot looking both sides to see if it's safe to cross yet.

7. No FUCKING MAMAK!!!

8. You realize how much you miss proper m'sian food when you head back home and you just gorge yourself until you puke then gorge yourself all over again. Then get stuck in an infinite loop of eating and puking until it's time to board the plane back.

9. They line up for everything.EVERYTHING.urgh.

10. They block torrent sites.KNNCCB!!!btw P2P is illegal...WTF?

11. One for the road. They're freaking workaholics but the money is good.

*PS: the name of the country i currently am in has been omitted to protect me for being charge under any weird rules/regulations they have. hmmm come to think of it. do i have any *down south friends...?

~Notes to You~

"I'm sorry, you weren't suppose to hear what I said about you and what I wanted to do to you. I didn't know you were listening. I made sure you couldn't hear what I was talking about behind your back. I know you're angry but don't do this to me, don't breakdown in front of me when I need you the most and don't give me the silent treatment in the morning. It been so many years, don't you think it's time the both of us moved on? I'm sure someone out there needs you more than I do now and of course the same goes for me. Do you know the price that you're going for is as cheap as a cheap whore, you are just a local anyways, so I don't blame you. You've been awesome all these years, but I need, I want something better...It's not you, It's me..."

p/s : ~Notes to You~ is dedicated to my car (my trusty proton wira), since the day she heard I had intentions of selling her off. She has been acting all weird...*lolz*

~Sooner than later?~

I guess the day I got up and left was always dawning, I just never knew it would happen so fast, one moment I'm sitting in a room being interviewed and being offered an opportunity of a lifetime, next moment I'm logging heads with my manager bout my resignation notice, it's a real relief that, that drama is all over. Soon, I would be leaving to chase my dream. To chase my destiny perhaps? I've been asking for a challenge all along haven't I? The Challenge has been put on a silver platter now. But yet I'm having mix emotions about leaving. My head screams "Go chase your dreams!!!"...My heart yells "What about home?What about family?What about mum?"...Am I worrying too much?Am I over thinking stuff?Just the other day...


Me : Ma, I'll be going in two weeks. Are you sure you want me to go? You'll be all alone...
Mum : ......Sooner or later, you'll leave right?It's a once in a lifetime opportunity. Go for it. I'll be alright...
Me : ..................................

I just didn't know what to say. I felt like breaking down. But I put on a brave face. I acted as though it was nothing. But deep inside, no one else but me knew that I didn't want to leave. I was scared. I was petrified. But if I stayed I would be letting go of my dreams. Letting go of what I believed in. Ma, I'm sure you'll be fine. But I'm not sure if I'll be fine. I think I'm more worried of me being alone than you are of me being alone. Get it? But, I'll take the first step out to test the waters, I'll make you, koko (not forgetting mandy) and pa (god bless his soul) proud. You all have sacrifice so much to get me where I am today. I won't let you down. I won't let us down.

And then it beckons, how would a boy always living under mummy's care pack up and leave?Out in the world all alone. Allergic to soap powder and goes *bluek* at the slightest smelly smell.And not forgetting my biggest fear.No clean underwear...SERIOUS...looks like I'll be using my swimming trunks alot huh? (inside joke)...one more thing, about that carton of Indomee. It's still there right?...